Browsing Category

Spiritual Seeker

I’m also a sober guy trying to make sense of the world. Click below for random observations on spirituality and recovery.

Recovery Share: Acceptance and Making Better Choices

  • Paul Gerald
  • December 21, 2015
  • Comments Off on Recovery Share: Acceptance and Making Better Choices

I don’t know about you, but I am big into making plans. That’s not a problem, of course. Without plans we can’t meet each other, build ships, and accomplish goals. The trouble for me comes when I get overly attached to my plans. The story goes like this: I had a plan that was going…

Recovery Share: The Scripts in my Head

  • Paul Gerald
  • November 15, 2015
  • Comments Off on Recovery Share: The Scripts in my Head

I have recently said some things that made me uncomfortable — not in the old sense, where I’d say something and then later cringe, like some crazy shit blurted out when I was drunk. What I mean is that I had to say something which might upset somebody, or make them uncomfortable. And since, in my…

Recovery Share: Should I Be Happier?

  • Paul Gerald
  • October 25, 2015
  • Comments Off on Recovery Share: Should I Be Happier?

The other day somebody asked me how things are going, and I told him, “Well, the job is good, I just got back from leading a tour in Italy, my relationship is terrific, I’m paying down my debt, I’ve been out hiking a little, and my health is good.” And all of that is true….

Recovery Share: Self-Awareness and Step 4

  • Paul Gerald
  • March 10, 2015
  • Comments Off on Recovery Share: Self-Awareness and Step 4

Didn’t get a chance to share in a meeting this morning, but here’s what I would have said, the topic being Step 4 and those “misdirected instincts.” “Creation gave us instincts for a purpose. … Yet these instincts, so necessary for our existence, often far exceeded their proper functions. Powerfully, blindly, many times subtly, they…

Recovery Share: When the Magic Just Isn’t There

  • Paul Gerald
  • January 4, 2015
  • Comments Off on Recovery Share: When the Magic Just Isn’t There

One of my favorite metaphors for life is that it’s like a walk in the mountains: sometimes you’re going up, sometimes you’re going down. To take it a couple steps further: sometimes it’s actually hard to tell if you’re going up or down, much less what’s coming next. Sometimes we’re surprised by our progress, when…

On Asking for Help

  • Paul Gerald
  • December 22, 2014
  • Comments Off on On Asking for Help

There’s a pretty standard part of every recovery story, and it’s certainly a part of mine: that time when you hit bottom, realize you’re screwed, and then finally become ready to seek help. What happened to me was that I had built up a serious belief system in my head; the main message was, “This…

On Motivations, and Honesty With Self

  • Paul Gerald
  • November 16, 2014
  • Comments Off on On Motivations, and Honesty With Self

The other day I was headed into a conversation with a friend, when I caught myself getting excited about one particular thing we might be talking about: drama involving other people. Basically, this friend of mine is involved in a situation which I have avoided because of its high potential for drama, but then I…

Recovery Share: Thoughts On Catastrophizing

  • Paul Gerald
  • November 9, 2014
  • Comments Off on Recovery Share: Thoughts On Catastrophizing

One of the amazing things about how my mind works, or doesn’t, is its ability to catastrophize. I don’t know how common that word is outside of recovery circles, so I’ll explain briefly. This month I had a $150 expense which I forgot to account for, so a couple days ago when I thought I…

Recovery Share: Oh, Those Character Defects

  • Paul Gerald
  • October 19, 2014
  • Comments Off on Recovery Share: Oh, Those Character Defects

I was in a meeting the other night where Step 6 was the topic, and when the book came around, this is what I got to read: In reality, many of our lives were full of strife. It felt like life was a war—us against them. There was a fierce competition for power, wealth, ideas,…